Hey, so- Unrelated question. If I suddenly started reading my own messages, and they don't feel like they're mine, and I'm questioning my own avatar/name.. What does that mean?
(but it's also easy for the young, or active-imagination'd learning about plurality without any real guidance, to have experiences like that)
Deleted User
Hey, so- Unrelated question. If I suddenly started reading my own messages, and they don't feel like they're mine, and I'm questioning my own avatar/name.. What does that mean?
I was trying to remember what I was doing when I first switched with my headmate- It's this vague light-headed feeling, then I start disassociating with "seasons". That's what lead me to switch with my first headmate.
Luminesce: If you experience dissociative problems often that you feel are negatively impacting your life, you can see a professional (therapist or psychiatrist) for a diagnosis(edited)
3:22 AM
But if they feel more voluntary, it could just be you semi-consciously wanting to have said experiences.
Luminesce: I may call latching onto switching one of those "quirks" I mentioned that may be used to try to convince yourselves of progress, when you can't believe it's being made otherwise(edited)
3:36 AM
All I can recommend is just really giving vocality a shot, even when it seems doubtful who is talking
You live in the same brain space, you can talk to each other if you believe it. If you can switch in a moment and they talk, then you can have them talk without switching too
The only way you can create the brain wiring necessary to experience tulpamancy is to start doing it. Vocality doesn't always start off easy, clear, or convincing, but you have to really go at it until it is, and don't write off any plausible responses as "illegitimate"
3:38 AM
(write off unwanted responses, ie invasive thoughts, though - basically anything really random or negative, or that doesn't make sense contextually)
3:39 AM
I gotta go, so you can keep asking others (or even just talk in #lounge if you want), or you can just get started on the mental work of continuing to establish tulpamancy practices and skills in the mind
Well, without holding the host in your attention, I would say that's the default. The host would be active in a tulpa-like state for as long as a tulpa normally would be, before you stop paying attention to them (or no time if not at all)
3:41 AM
Best to practice good switching hygiene, by making sure both parties are always fully aware immediately preceding and after the switching process, but, you're clearly still figuring it out for yourselves, so..
I'm sorry for holding you up- I'm just trying to figure out what's going on in my headspace. I'm back- I'm actually back- But like, I'm supposed to be able to communicate with the host, right? I just don't know what's going on.
Either I am the host, and I'm having a serious moment of disassociation, or we're failing as headmates to communicate with eachother properly-
3:44 AM
I can say "I'm here, I'm alive", but now the host doesn't have a voice. And I don't know if we're somehow blocking eachother out accidentally, because that's how I was formed a few years ago- You know, that whole DID thing- Or if I am the host, and I'm just going crazy.
3:44 AM
I'm just gonna lay down and try to figure out what's going on in my headspace.
Luminesce: Well, that would be why basically nobody tries to do switching before accomplishing vocality. Communication is a must, especially when trying to reason out an experience as confusing as switching.(edited)
To be honest, starting tulpamancy with switching as a communication aid requires confidence that basically no one should have who was yet unable to accomplish basic vocality
I don't know how, but I've managed to form without vocality and just by switching. As the host said- we're pretty sure it's because we were tricked into thinking we had DID, and that's how it works for DID, so.. that's how it started for us.
3:49 AM
Whether or not it's the wrong way to do things, I'm here. I'm alive. And I'm in control- And I have no clue what I'm supposed to be doing next.
Yeah but- before learning how to run two people at the same time. Is there any cases of a tulpamancer switching with his tulpa, without the ability to run two at once?
Luminesce: Nothing stops a switched tulpa from trying to teach the brain the live-communication thing by communicating with their host who would be in a tulpa-like state(edited)
3:55 AM
Except me telling you that pursuing switching pre-vocality is terribly messy and a bad foundation to start off tulpamancy with
You need to understand that all thoughtforms are equally real to begin with. It's your sensation of fakeness that is false. This is something the mind does to retain control and prevent literal psychosis. The goal of tulpamancy is not to communicate with something mysterious and other that you can't perceive, because that's simply not how brains work. The goal is to lift that sensation from a particular line of thought.
If you imagine your tulpa right now, saying something, that is them. And it's also not parroting if you do instinctively rather than consciously decide what they're going to say beforehand.
11:25 AM
I think the others are seriously overcomplicating this for you. You fundamentally have to accept that the train of thought of a character is real. There's nothing more to it than that. Vocality isn't a skill you don't already have. You already use empathy, you already talk in your own head, and you already automatically imagine characters and other people in various situations to simulate things you have not experienced. Everyone does.
11:25 AM
You already know how to talk impulsively, you've said as much. So let yourself do it. That's all. Imagine this character. And if you're bad at designing characters, lift one from fiction that you like.(edited)
Your expectations are in a very strange place
